Turks and Caicos: Part 2

Logic will get you from A to Z: Imagination will get you everywhere. – Albert Einstein

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We’ve been on this magical island since last Tuesday. I have no idea how many days ago that was. I’ve kind of lost track of time here.

1) I’ve had the privilege of traveling to quite a few places in my lifetime. This place tops it. You’re going to get tired of hearing me say that. I apologize in advance, but it’s the truth. This is what I imagine life after after death looks like. It leaves you speechless no matter how long you sit and meditate on the pure beauty that lies in front of you.

2) You have to come visit at least once. You can thank me later. 🙂

3) Sunscreen doesn’t work here no matter the SPF. Or, maybe it’s because I’m as pale as a vampire. Despite the shade, sunscreen and hats, I look like a ripe tomato with freckles.

4) Met a guy on the beach named Mike. Hotel business guy from Europe. Lived here for 8 years. Came and visited. Never left. I get it. He’s helping us look for a house here.

5) Just kidding about #4. Maybe…Not about Mike, but the house thing. Again, maybe…

6) Apparently this is the hangout for movie stars and musicians, like Beyonce, Jay-Z and Bruce Willis. The paparazzi don’t really hang here. We just missed Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick last week. “Bueller. Bueller….”

7) Four words: Chalk Sound National Park

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8) I’ve been doing laundry in a hut out back. I never thought I’d hang everyone’s underwear on a clothesline. There is a first time for everything..

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9) Lizards are everywhere. One joined me in the shower last night. We talked about Geico a bit before he left.

10) There is a $300 million dollar yacht off of Grace Bay Beach. Owned by a Russian. It’s his “play money” apparently. Been asking the locals about it. We see it every night at sunset. Look up the “A” yacht on Google. You’ll find it. I wish I had $300 million dollars to just throw around for the heck of it. 🙂

11) I’ve read 3 books in less than a week. In a hammock. Amen.

12) The stars at night are extraordinary here. We miss so much of this at home with all the city lights. Has a way of making you extremely grateful, thankful, and in awe of the vast universe we reside in.

13) They have one radio station here. It skips from Billy Joel to weird music about getting your hair cut with your friend. I’m not kidding. I’ll call it…ECLECTIC.

14) Canadians love Turks & Caicos. I don’t know why. But, I’m pretty sure I now talk with a slight Canadian accent…

15) It’s $11 for a small box of Cascade, and $5 for a pound of bananas…

16) Our rental car is from 1990. Has to be. A Nissan Sunny. What the heck is that?! You have to turn the air conditioner off to get it to start. It’s like Back To The Future here when it comes to vehicles. Every car has at least one broken taillight, a trunk that has been roped shut, or hubcaps that have been zip-tied on.

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17) My hair looks like perfect mermaid hair here. Natural beach waves and sun kissed color. If I attempted the same look at home, I would no doubt look like a cat who had been recently electrocuted.

18) Swimming works off calories in a hurry. Thankful for this. Bacon, eggs and hashbrowns every single morning…#CaloriesAreInevitableOnVacation

19) Not a lot of bugs on the island, but dragonflies are the size of a small child here. Terrified.

20) Cows like to stand in the shade under abandoned semi-trucks on the side of the road. I’ll let you imagine this picture on your own…..

21) The local fro-yo hang-out spot here is called Giggles. I find this odd and laughable at the same time. No pun intended.

22) Driving on the left hand side of the road, your husband driving in the passenger seat (per the USA) is puzzling. It’s especially puzzling when the vehicle that rolls up beside you at a round about contains a local driver with a large beer in his hand and a dozen people stuffed in the back of the bed of his pick-up truck with wheels that look like they are going to fly off at any second because they are missing two of the four lug nuts. In other wards, traffic laws are kind of non-existent here. *Again, refer to the word ‘Terrifying’*

23) Swimming here is like swimming within the depths of Finding Nemo. Fish love people here. They’ll follow you. All shapes, all sizes, all colors. It’s incredible. I’m cool with this as long as I don’t meet Bruce the Shark or his friends…

24) Speedos should be outlawed. That is all…

25) You can’t bring Conch shells back to the US. You can take them back to Canada, but not the US! What do they think; we’re going to hock Conch shells in a back alleyway of Dallas? “Psst. Hey, hey you. Want a Conch shell? $20 bucks. Follow me around back of the 7-Eleven across the street. Billy is watching for the Conch police. We good.”

Love From The BeachBums Who Are Never Coming Home,

VSK