There’s a lump in my throat…there has been all day as I read the countless Facebook, blog and Twitter posts remembering those lost on September 11th, 2001.
My children and I had homeschool history class this morning. A wonderful history class by an incredible woman, friend, teacher…and a child of 9/11. A woman who lost her father on Flight 77 eleven years ago today.
When I saw her today, the pin she was wearing caught my eye first thing. I know how hard this day is for her, and as a friend, I let the moment cease of saying “I’m sorry.” I can sense the pain of what an act of evil terror took from her life, but it’s not my place to offer condolences. Sorry doesn’t stop the pain or fight the infection of loss. My friendship is my gift. A gift that is given freely to her daily, and she knows that. I can’t “feel” what she feels, but I can cover her with grace the best I know how. Sometimes loss doesn’t need an “I’m sorry”…it needs a reason to go forward in life.
As I sat in class with my children and her son, I watched my youngest child who is only 8, open his notebook to take notes. As he wrote the date, he proceeded to write “remember”. My sweet little one wasn’t here when 9/11 occurred, but he has been taught what the face of evil looks like. He knows today is September 11th…and he knows what that means.
As we drove to class, beautiful American flags waved in the cool breeze here in North Texas this morning. My little one, nose pressed to the car window, watched them with wonder.
“Mommy, are these flags out to remember today?”
I smiled at his question. “Yes sweetheart, we must always remember.”
What a powerful word that is! I saw it in the 8 year old handwriting of my son this morning. And as my dear, loving friend taught us about Gilgamesh, what an empire is, and how kings ruled thousands of years ago, I watched my son write those words on his paper.
I remember where I was eleven years ago today. A new, exhausted mother with 14 month old twins, jumping into the shower for ten minutes of peace as they played with Thomas the Tank Engine. When I drew the towel around me, dark circles under my eyes from little sleep, I heard Katie Couric’s voice announce to the world where evil had bled. As I pulled on a pair of jeans and a shirt, I lept towards my sons, taking them in my arms as they ate a bowl of Cheerios in my lap, my ear pressed to the receiver of the phone as I spoke to my husband at work. I begged for him to come home, afraid of where life was moving, raging thoughts of loss in my mind.
I have seen countless stories and recollections of where others were 11 years ago. This is mine.
As I think of today, the lives that were lost, this beautiful country that was violently attacked and the families forever changed…I think of my son. The word that he wrote today, I vow to always remember. Just like he does now.
Give Grace ~
Read my amazing friend, Susan Van Volkenburgh’s, book, “Silent Resolve and the God Who Let Me Down”. It’s her 10 year journey of losing her father on 9/11, and how she found peace with God. Amazing….amzn.to/Qbiae4