Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

25 Reflections for 2014

2014…What a ride!

1) I published a book this year. To this lover of words, it was a huge accomplishment. “A Cradle of Hope” is embedded with a piece of my soul, no doubt.

2) Took my three boys to see Imagine Dragons in concert in Dallas this past February. Without a doubt, it birthed the bubbling fire of love for the art of music in my youngest son. Can’t wait to see where this takes him.

3) Started drinking coffee every single morning. I was always a tea drinker in the mornings, but I’ve been driven to the dark side by coffee grounds and caramel creamer.

4) Went to Daytona Beach Florida. Watched it rain for three days straight. Grew to love Bloody Mary’s because of it. Rain at the beach = binge drinking.

5) Universal Studios Florida this past May. Harry Potter is, and will forever be, a love of mine. There is something so electric about visiting this extraordinary world in person.

6) Butterbeer is sinful. Particularly when drinking it while standing in Diagon Alley.

7) Three words: THE GLITCH MOB

8) A viral WordPress post with over 90,000 views this past March thanks to The Glitch Mob. I dig you boys to the moon and back again.

9) Meeting “The Mob” twice this year. Because frankly, we consider them family. They’ve not only changed the lives of my kids, but mine.

10) A pretty spectacular friendship was birthed because of “The Mob”. She knows who she is, that I adore her, and that fate is real. I love ya, soul baller. Mean it.

11) Chocolate truffles are wicked. I will NEVER tell how many I’ve eaten this year. NEVER…

12) Fell in love with the Mara Dyer book series by Michelle Hodkin. Have you read them? You should. They are amazing.

13) New York City with my sister in law for a long weekend. This city…I will never grow tired of it.

14) Realized the beach is my calling. Someday I must live on one. There is something that stirs my soul when I’m there.

15) Was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. That was extremely devastating to me. I had a hard time coming to terms with it, but with the help of family and close friends, I’ve prevailed and will continue to.

16) Got my first tattoo. I’m pretty sure I’m now infinitely hooked to ink. I’ll be back in the chair before long. 🙂

17) Made crepes for the first time this year. I will never do it again. Why? Don’t ask.

18) Realized that daily “quiet time” and meditation makes a huge difference in my life. As a busy mother and wife, I never realized how much I internalized my stress. We should all take some time each day to release.

19) “The Art of Stillness”. Incredible book gifted to me by a friend. Will change your life. It certainly changed mine. Add it to your 2015 reading list. Mean it.

20) Am now pen pals with the author of “The Art of Stillness” Pico Iyer. Amazing man. He has a true gift with words. We’re tight.

21) Discovered Jack Daniel’s Honey Whiskey. Word.

22) Went another year of having to show my ID for purchases, whether it was for alcohol, markers, or spray paint. Considering I’m 15 years past the age of 21, I’ll take it with a side of awesome sauce.

23) A new avid collector of vinyl records. My childhood has come alive, and all the memories of days spent going through my father’s records has risen. My kids are now fascinated with vinyls.

24) Mother of the Year for #23.

25) Booked a dream vacation. One that I have dreamt about for years. Hubby and I finally took the plunge, and surprised our kids. April 2015. Bucket list item checked off.

Turks
Turks & Caicos

 

Una Vita. Vivat. – One Life. Live It.

Cheers to 2015 ~

V.S.K.

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

When You Know You’re Too Old For Theme Parks

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We’ve been in Florida since last Thursday the 1st. The first half of our vacation involved the beach. The second half involves Universal Studios.

We have three more days at the park.

I may die.

My feet hurt, and my back is tweaked on the right side from riding “The Mummy” roller coaster at least half a dozen times in two days because my children love it. To the point that it has gotten annoying. But they don’t want to ride alone, so my husband and I continue riding like two handicapped parents with a hitch in their get-along. I’ve also memorized the entire script of the ride, word for word. This is the only thing that keeps me entertained.

We have been the only Americans in the theme park. I’m quite certain I know how to speak Portuguese, French and Italian fluently now, thanks to long wait times in line. Take that, Rosetta Stone!

I will NEVER get tired of The Wizarding World of Harry Potter in the park. NEVER. I could just sit and listen to the music while drinking Butterbeer. It’s easy to get lost here. Not just in the magic of being a part of Potterland, but actually LOST. There have been so many people in this part of the park it’s redonk. This is also the part of the park where you realize you are some of the few Americans present. This is due to the hairy armpit women, and men without deodorant. Pleasant. Pleasant, I tell you.

Yesterday we were waiting in line for “Harry Potter and The Forbidden Journey”. This is an incredible ride that takes place inside Hogwarts. AWESOME. Anyhow, since there are 5 of us, we are always one short or one too many for a ride, which means we have to split up. Hubby and the older two went together, and I went with Little A.

I am a moron magnet. Convinced. There were two older gentlemen in front of Little A and I. One was guzzling…not sipping…a very LARGE beer. His five steps forward and then stopping for a selfie photo in front of various sights as we walked to the ride entrance grew very annoying. Very quickly. We reached the front of the line finally. He decided to stop and answer a text message. Yes, a text. I bit my tongue in front of my child…momentarily.

“Let’s move along!” I said aloud.

He started walking and replied very loudly, “God, I’m texting!” AG&SJ#*S) <—–That’s the words going through my mind. The filtered version.

This will be a fun ride. Little A and I end up in the same car with the two guys. The intoxicated moron pulls out his phone as soon as he is out of the sight of the employees to tape the ride. Or update his Facebook. Or take another ugly selfie. Or call the President. Or throw it at Harry Potter…

The ride stops. I hear the lady say they are experiencing technical difficulties. Moron #1 & #2 didn’t hear her. So I decided to play my cards.

“Uh, you need to put your phone away. You can’t have it out on the ride. That’s why they stopped it.”

He looks at me, wide eyed and dumbfounded as he fumbles with his phone, trying to stuff it back into his pocket, his big meaty claw hands trying to hide the iPhone I called him out on.

The ride starts. I laugh on the inside. I’m not a mean person. But I don’t care for individuals who think the world revolves around them. I don’t think he enjoyed the rest of his ride much. I’m sure he took a selfie and texted his buddy Bob afterwards to let him know all about it. I feel sorry for Bob.

My youngest has had diarrhea and a runny nose since yesterday morning. He feels fine otherwise. I’m convinced he has what’s called, “Too much vacation”. This disease is a result of getting up at the crack of dawn to get to the theme park before everyone else, eating cr@p in the park, such as $21 buckets of stale popcorn in Jurassic Park because the popcorn comes in a plastic dinosaur head that we NEED to take home, and touching cr@p in the park that has been touched by thousands of people. <—- The thought of this kind of makes me nauseous. I may become a germaphobe before we leave here…

Riding a scooter while drinking a coke the size of a small child, Laffy Taffy and cigarettes in your front basket along with park brochures, and a full size bag of Lay’s potato chips in your hands does make me question your motives as to why you are riding in a scooter in the first place…I don’t believe “handicapped” plays into the reasoning…Just a guess…This includes the 3 other individuals riding along side you doing the same thing. Except the guy with the nachos who is steering with one hand, might prove me otherwise…

Overall, we’ve had a blast. So many memories. SO MANY. We’ve re-discovered each other as a family this past week. It has been amazing.

Only a few more days until we head home. I miss my bed. I miss my dog. I miss my coffee maker. But I have to admit, I hate the thought of leaving. Honestly.

Signing off. It’s time to head to the pool for a while. I also enjoy the strawberry daiquiris here at the hotel. They are $11.95 each, but, you know…It’s vacation. And I’m exhausted. But I’m grateful beyond belief for this little life of mine.

Stopping to to take snapshots of your life is so important. My camera lens is overflowing this week…

I love daiquiris and pool towels ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

The World Through A Little One’s Eyes ~ An Interview With A 10 Year Old

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Me: So, thanks for letting me interview you today, Little A. Are you ready to answer these tough questions?

Little A: {Rolling eyes} Yes, Mommy. You said I could have a bowl of jellybeans after this though. You promised. Don’t…forget. {Leaning in REALLY close} Sometimes you forgettttt. (Touche’ Little A, Touche’)

Me: So, tell me, what has been the greatest disappointment in your life? Please elaborate.

Little A: {Laughing} Something fake, like a fake disappointment? No wait…I’m a little disappointed the Easter Bunny didn’t bring me Pokemon cards. But, that’s okay. I forgave him already.

Me: A monkey, a ghost and a horse with tap shoes on walks into a movie theatre…who sits down first, and why?

Little A: Whattttt, are you saying?! Well, the monkey because the ghost and horse are too slow, but the monkey is fast. Like, REALLY fast.

Me: What’s your take on the rising gas prices in the US?

Little A: Seriously?! Well, I guess it’s because the world makes dumb rules sometimes. That’s why.

Me: Please spell LACHRYMOSE, and provide me with the definition as well.

Little A: L-a-c-a-m-o-s-e. A wizard’s spell that makes you feel stupid when you shouldn’t feel stupid. You should feel smart, but I don’t, because I can’t spell this word right…

Me: Why do you think Chick-Fil-A misspells the word “chicken” in their TV commercials?

Little A: Because the cows didn’t go to college…

Me: Do you know what it means when someone says, “Don’t toot your own horn, Billy!”

Little A: Does it have to do with passing gas? If so, it means walk away before you pass gas to be polite to others in your realm.

Me: Do you know WHY the dish ran away with spoon after the cow jumped over the moon?

Little A: They ran away together because they loved each other. Silverware has a tendency to do that, or in this case, I think they do…That’s my take. {shrugs shoulders}

Me: So, I know how much you love Imagine Dragons. If you could have dinner with Dan Reynolds, what would you wear, where would you go to eat, and would you hug him or offer him a handshake? I don’t think he believes in cooties…

Little A: I would wear normal clothes, of course. Like shorts, and stuff. We would go to Chick-Fil-A, and I’d give him a handshake. I’d hug him after dessert. I think the time would be right then.

Me: Who’s your favorite? Mom or Dad? Wait…don’t answer that. Your Dad might read this, and it would make him sad…

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Me: Tell me, what is the meaning of life?

Little A: Can I ask Siri this question? No? Well then, life is just life. Live it, and live it good because we only get one.

Me: If Hogwarts was real…and I’m not necessarily saying it isn’t, but it might not be, but we like to believe that it is…what house do you think the Sorting Hat would choose for you and why?

Little A: Ravenclaw because it’s EPIC.

Me: How old do you think you’ll be when you get married? What do you think her name will be?

Little A: I’ll be 92 when I get married. Her name will be…{hanging upside down in the chair out of boredom}…

Me: If you could be invisible for one day, what would you do? It has to be legal, by the way.

Little A: It has to be legal?! Darn it…I would go knock on people’s doors and scare them. Maybe give them chocolate…melted chocolate…

Me: Luggage is to vacation, like tools are to…?

Little A: What? Say it again? Work, I guess. Tools are to work, because I don’t know of anyone who uses tools to play with. You shouldn’t play with tools. Especially if they are Dad’s tools…

 

Mom Love Times A Million ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

An Open Letter To The Glitch Mob From a Grateful Mother In Dallas

Life has a way of moving at lightening speed. And as it moves, you move with it, leaving you hungover with irreplaceable memories.

In the past week, I have been incredibly humbled by a number of things, including an inbox full of emails and comments from people around the world in regards to my previous blog post, An Open Letter To The Glitch Mob From a Tired Mother in Dallas. Whoa. 168 hours ago I was sitting in my home office drinking coffee, wiping the sleep from my tired eyes, wondering what to fix for lunch…leftover pot roast or boxed macaroni and cheese…leaning more towards the macaroni option, in case you were wondering…when my world became yours.

I went from fuzzy house shoes at home, to black boots in The Glitch Mob’s dressing room at The House of Blues in Dallas in a matter of hours with my oldest son. Rock on, chili dog. Totally.

My left ear had an annoying “buzzing” sound for three days after the concert. Totally worth it! I must have said, “Huh?” a thousand times last week though. I’m going to continue using this tactic when my middle child asks me what’s for dinner each night…

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The Glitch guys are beyond sweet, totally down to earth, and incredibly generous. I have to admit, I wish more bands were like this today.

Fans frame your future.

These guys get it, and they take it to a higher level than I ever expected. That REALLY says something. I genuinely mean that.

I wanted to share a few comments that were sent to me over the past week that did NOT make the “approved” list from fellow #GlitchMom goers. These are ACTUAL questions/comments I received, yes. They deserve an answer, but in a more filtered environment.

1) I want your phone number. – Send me your phone number first, and then I’ll send you mine. Mine starts with, 555-xxxx. Is yours the same?

2) You’re hot. – My husband agrees with you…

3) Have you ever considered asking The Glitch Mob for a PR job? Ask for Donny if you do. I’ll make sure he knows you’ll be in contact. – No, actually… and who’s Donny? I’m guessing it’s not a “Donny” that any of the band members or their staff knows considering the email address this comment was sent from started with, hustlepictures@…Thank you for playing (air quotes) “Donny”…

4) Will you write my collage literature paper for me please? – Do you mean college literature paper? Or, do you want me to make you a collage of literature on a piece of paper? Get back to me on this and we’ll talk…

5) Would you be willing to tell Josh “hello” for me?! – Sure. Hello Josh! <—- Sent from Stephanie in Idaho

6) You’re lame. Not really. You’re awesome! – Thanks! I mean, not really. I like cats…no, birds…fish!…trees…Christmas presents!!!!

If this wasn’t enough, my youngest son’s 10th birthday is today. He is a child with a very giving heart, and one that insisted adamantly that my husband and I didn’t need to buy him a birthday present this year. There was no way we were going to let the dive into double digits pass by without a present.

So, we took his greatest love, Imagine Dragons, and turned it into something he can hold onto forever. This video is something I will cherish for the rest of my life.

 

My middle child…the quiet one. The one with a creative mind like his mother. I owe him. I hope Linkin Park is available for dinner sometime next month. I bet their number starts with 555-xxxx also….I’ll give’m a ring…

Grateful #GlitchMom ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

An Open Letter To The Glitch Mob From a Tired Mother In Dallas

momswholoveTGM

@editbeats, @ooah, @boreta ~

The above is how I refer to you three sweet guys. I am an Instagram fanatic, so “@” symbol names are as good as royalty titles. Word.

I use “sweet” loosely since I don’t know any of you personally, but when motherhood hits you in the face everyone becomes “sweetie”, “love”, “sweetheart” and “pookey bear”. Seriously. Just go ask your moms…

I am attending your concert tonight in Dallas at The House of Blues. My oldest son is quite enthralled with your music. Never in a million years did I ever think I’d be telling the ladies at book club, “Yes Beverly, I heard the Elton John concert was incredibly amazing!” (Takes a looonnnnggg sip of wine…) “I am really looking forward to seeing this epic concert on March 24th though. I mean, sheesh,  Elton John is the bomb, but The Glitch Mob, girl you don’t know what music IS until you’ve heard these beats!” <—-I’m sure this sentence just aged me 20 years in your eyes.

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I admit, you are on my repeated playlist on my iPhone. Secondly, I even have a Spotify station dedicated to you. You are quite special to this mother who sings “Beauty of the Unhidden Heart” in the car on the way to Target to buy dog biscuits and hydrating shampoo…

This morning, I told myself I was going to sleep in. Your concert starts at 9pm tonight. Who scheduled this? An 18 year old? I go to bed at 9:30 each night to watch one re-run of Modern Family, and one re-run of Friends. This is my schedule, and I don’t like changing it. Tonight I will be forced to miss my old person motherhood schedule to drive 45 minutes to bring my 13 year old son to see his favorite group ever. When you are a parent, you do crazy things; things you used to do as a teenager. Except instead of binge drinking, you stay out late to take your teen to see The Blades. I don’t know what The Blades are, but I’m guessing it doesn’t have anything to do with a Skintimate commercial…Just a hunch.

There is a trip planned to 7-Eleven to buy a Red Bull before tonight’s venture. The only time I drink these carbonated beverages from Hades is when my husband and I go to Vegas each year. Alone. Without kids. To do things without kids. Like, sleep in late and play The Wizard of Oz slot machine. Because everyone knows that Dorothy’s red shoes means the bonus round is commencing and you might win $20 bucks even though you just wasted $60 WAITING for the bonus round…I’m getting off topic…

It is also Monday. I hate Mondays as it is. Although your concert this evening will make my Monday a little brighter, it is going to cause my Tuesday to stink like spoiled chicken. I am convinced tomorrow night my old person motherhood bedtime will be closer to 7:30, thus forcing me to miss my re-runs. I’m not sure how I feel about this yet. Maybe The Blades will convince me otherwise. We’ll see, sweet ones…

My children and I saw Imagine Dragons last month in Dallas. We also had the pleasure of meeting Nico Vega, and spent a bit of time conversing with Aja Volkman. When my oldest son told her how much he loved her vocals on your new album, her sincere nod and, “Nice. Thank you so much! You’ve got great taste in music, my friend…seriously,” has been the topic of MANY conversations at the dinner table ever since. So much so, I want to tape his mouth shut at times. I’m kidding, not really…(clearing throat)

So, I am already aware that I will probably be the oldest person attending your concert this evening. I am okay with that, I suppose. We’ve been listening to you since before the dawn of time, so it’s only right that we come and experience who you are in person. No, we will not wait for you in the back alley standing around like weirdos, wishing to scream, “Oh My Gaw, it’s The Glitch Mob! Like, you guys are totally freakin’ awesome, here, can you please sign my forehead for me?”, but we will come and support your music.

Because you’re kinda cool… Not “kinda”, you’re cooler than a fat kid in a candy store, let’s keep it real. I will be a zombie tomorrow for you with pupils the size of dinner plates because of the amount of coffee I will inhale, literally, to stay awake. But more importantly, I’ll have a kid who got to experience the explosive encounter of hearing The Glitch Mob live. And for me, that’s enough. Because this is what moms do for their kids. At least, I do. Please don’t forget that I’m missing my old person motherhood bedtime for you though. There is true meaning in this. Dedication and respect, right there. This is incredibly important. I expect The Blades to keep me awake…

P.S. I hope you don’t have any future encounters with noisy refrigerators. They are quite annoying, aren’t they?

T.G.M. (otherwise known as, The Good Mother) –

VSK

 

** FOLLOW-UP**

I am so honored, and so immensely blessed to have received so many comments, posts and emails pertaining to this blog post from all of you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am truly humbled, amazed, grateful, and genuinely thankful for The Glitch Mob. I owe them the world, and then some. My son and I were so blessed to get to meet the members of the Mob in person before their set this past Monday night in Dallas. They were incredibly sweet, and truly kind in every way possible. A night my son and I will never forget. Ever.

#GlitchMom for life,

Val

GlitchMobMom

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

Verizon Is Run By Monkeys From Outer Space

verizonmonkey

Holy freaking bananas…this week has been utterly 100% ridiculous.

You know the saying, “When it rains, it pours”. I have been drenched to the core this week from all angles.

From strep throat that has overtaken our house, being stranded in the Walgreens parking lot with a dead car battery, incompetent people at Aetna insurance who failed to enter prescription drug coverage for my children despite the $4,000,000 we pay them each month in premiums AS A FAMILY, and Verizon FIOS….Oh Verizon FIOS…

As a busy wife, working mom and homeschooling aficionado, when things happen I need a solution. A remedy to get our family back on track.

1) The disgusting strep bug is now under control thanks to antibiotics and copious amounts of Lysol and Purell.

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2) While standing in line talking to Steven the gum-smacking moron at Walgreens about WHY my antibiotics are not covered by insurance, I found myself fueled with the “I Don’t Have Time For This” energy only mothers know. The energy of trembling hands, fuzzy vision and the sound of blood pumping against your ear drums at an astounding pace as you try and remain cool in front of a slew of sick strangers. The “Your Husband Is At Work, and Doesn’t Have Enough Cash For Bail Money” in his wallet reasoning that you try so hard to grasp onto. I kept my cool, I paid for my antibiotics OUT OF POCKET, and then I bought a Voodoo doll across the street to seek my revenge. No not really. Yes, we’ll say that for now…

3) When I walked out into the parking lot of Walgreens to drive across the street to get my Voodoo doll go home, my car was dead as a doornail. <—- What does that even mean, “Dead as a doornail?” What is a doornail? Moving on…I am standing in the parking lot, hood open, tears in my tired eyes, my husband unavailable as he was in training for a new job position and not answering his phone this ONE time, as I seriously considered hitchhiking to Canada with a total stranger, Voodoo doll purse under my arm. A man pulls up in a pickup truck, sees the ragged mother in faded yoga pants and a nine year old t-shirt with a mustard stain, and asks if I needed help. I obliged, even though my mother told me not to talk to strangers, I’m in a public place and I’m desperate. He finds the problem, grabs his toolbox from the back of his truck, and has my car up and running in less than 5 minutes. Good people still exist in this world.  For that, I am ever so grateful.

4) Aetna insurance never fixed the pharmacy coverage for my kids. At this point, I let it slide after talking to Martha for more than 45 minutes. Even after all that time, she still didn’t fix the issue. Seriously? We change health insurance on Monday. Thank heavens! And the country wonders why our health care industry is in such ruin…Incompetency, plain and simple.

5) Verizon FIOS will forever be on my naughty list. I have informed Santa Claus to NEVER deliver any toys to them from here until eternity. We upgraded our internet speed on Monday, and ever since then, we have been unable to access secure websites (i.e. Capital One, Bank of America, Chase, etc.). After HOURS of tech support, and even a technician visit, we were repeatedly told that our issue was our devices NOT our internet service. I was desperate. Peeved. Sleep-deprived. And my Voodoo doll was already too full of pins head was throbbing. My 13 year old son, who loves computers, researched the issue all morning, created a fix on his own, and our internet has been working beautifully ever since.

My teenager fixed something trained employees couldn’t do at Verizon. I am not one to seek revenge, but Verizon has wasted so much of my time over the past three days that I decided to make one final phone call to explain the issue for the 1,563rd time to a tech support specialist, not mentioning that my son had actually already fixed the problem. I was told by the tech support specialist that there was an outage in my area. An outage that was affecting YouTube, Capital One, Bank of America, and several other websites, and the inability to load secured webpages while using FIOS. In other wards, I was blatantly lied to. WOW.

I am convinced, that in fact, Verizon FIOS is run by monkeys from outer space. And if you don’t believe me, visit your local zoo and ask any Orangoutang or Chimpanzee there. More than likely they have family members working in the Verizon technical support office. I PROMISE. Just ask for “Bob” or “Larry”…

I Hate Verizon ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

The Ice Apocalypse…and Other Reasons to Drink…

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A half an inch of ice my rear end…We have nearly three inches, and it’s not melting. At least, not fast enough for my liking.

You know those times when you REALLY want to see some beautiful white covering the ground during the holidays, so you can feel all “holiday-ish”? I feel more like Scrooge than an elf clicking his heels together as the season of Christmas draws near.

We haven’t gotten mail in two days.

I have no newspaper to read.

My kids are driving me nuts.

I’m tired of cooking.

The laundry is done. There is nothing else to wash, even the dog’s sweater smells like lilacs on a warm summer day.

I have learned to play SkyRim on XBOX 360…and I don’t even like XBOX. Don’t even ask me what the point of SkyRim is because I’m convinced there isn’t one.

I may sell my youngest child on eBay if we are still cooped up in this house tomorrow.

Yes, I have written like any good author should when he or she is stuck in the house. But you can only keep your creative juices flowing for so long as your children beg for something to eat, drink, do, fold, demolish, sled on or hit…

I’ve watched The Hobbit, Men In Black, Source Code, and countless episodes of International Living on HGTV. I want to move to New Zealand and live in tree house on a hill for the low price of 1.8 million. Let me know if you’d like to fund my move.

I have hang nails the size of orange peels thanks to the cold, dry air. I have hands of a carpenter. Gorgeous.

I’m tired of homemade pumpkin lentil soup. It was great on Friday. Today it makes me nauseous. I want a 4,000 calorie cheeseburger and fries from a drive thru window.

I simply want to DRIVE.

Ice play for my youngest has gone from sledding on Friday to dragging his entire body across the icy driveway today. When I went outside to ask him what he was doing, thinking he was hurt, he said he was teaching himself to “body sled”. His pants and gloves are soaked, but he refuses to come in. At least he is entertained…

I’ve rearranged the ornaments on the tree. Twice. For no good reason other than to keep from having a Clark W. Griswold moment…

Conversations with my children have become completely monotonous and annoying over the past four days. I love my kids, at this point, more than a cheap bottle of wine from Aldi that was meant for decoration but I decided to drink since I’m out of Dr. Pepper…

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Last Friday ~

Little A: “Can we go sledding outside, Mommy? Isn’t the white beautiful?”

Me: “Yes, let’s go sledding! Here are your gloves, sweetheart! Now let me go find the sled in the attic. Meet you outside!”

Today ~

Little A: “Is the ice melting? The temperature says 31, so it’s still below freezing. Do you think it will melt today though? Do you, do you, doooo yooouuuu? Can I have the stale half of a cookie I found in the pantry behind the empty bag of chips Middle A put back on the shelf because he’s too lazy to throw it away?”

Me: “Whatever. Eat the cookie. I wish the ice would melt. Please go find something to do.”

It’s amazing that when we are STUCK in the house, we are unmotivated and can’t find a darn thing to do. NOTHING.

Yet when we choose to stay home, we reorganize closets, dust the baseboards, paint murals and build a shed in the backyard for no good reason.

Little A: “Can you tell me what I can go do? I’m bored.”

Me: You bet I can tell you what to go do…”I don’t know, go play Legos or something. Watch a movie. Play Jenga. Pet the dog…”

Little A: “I don’t want to do any of that.” <—Said while lying on the ground, face first, hands outstretched like an annoying toddler…except he’s 9.

Me: “Then I don’t know what to tell you. Use your imagination.”

Little A: “What’s imaginotation?”

Me: “Never mind.”

Little A: “Never mind, what?”

Me: “Why don’t you go see what your brothers are doing. Maybe they’ll do something with you.”

Little A: “I don’t want to play with them. They say they are too old for “playing”. They say they “hang out” not play.”

Me: “Then go “hang out” with them.”

Little A: “Big A told me I was too young to do that, so he told me to come ask you what to do.” He picks his nose.

Me: “Do you need a Kleenex?”

Little A: “No.” <—While wiping said booger on his sleeve.

Me: “Glad we’ve got that covered…”

Little A: “Got what covered? The ground is still covered in ice. Is that what you mean, Mommy?”

Me: Thinking…….”Yes.”

He turns around and runs away. I give it twelve minutes before he’s back. I’ve never been so ready to grocery shop in all my life! Or even go and get gas…sounds like a freakin’ dream…

Stir crazy and utterly unamused with the ice anymore,

VSK