Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

The World Through A Little One’s Eyes ~ An Interview With A 10 Year Old

AdisonPR

Me: So, thanks for letting me interview you today, Little A. Are you ready to answer these tough questions?

Little A: {Rolling eyes} Yes, Mommy. You said I could have a bowl of jellybeans after this though. You promised. Don’t…forget. {Leaning in REALLY close} Sometimes you forgettttt. (Touche’ Little A, Touche’)

Me: So, tell me, what has been the greatest disappointment in your life? Please elaborate.

Little A: {Laughing} Something fake, like a fake disappointment? No wait…I’m a little disappointed the Easter Bunny didn’t bring me Pokemon cards. But, that’s okay. I forgave him already.

Me: A monkey, a ghost and a horse with tap shoes on walks into a movie theatre…who sits down first, and why?

Little A: Whattttt, are you saying?! Well, the monkey because the ghost and horse are too slow, but the monkey is fast. Like, REALLY fast.

Me: What’s your take on the rising gas prices in the US?

Little A: Seriously?! Well, I guess it’s because the world makes dumb rules sometimes. That’s why.

Me: Please spell LACHRYMOSE, and provide me with the definition as well.

Little A: L-a-c-a-m-o-s-e. A wizard’s spell that makes you feel stupid when you shouldn’t feel stupid. You should feel smart, but I don’t, because I can’t spell this word right…

Me: Why do you think Chick-Fil-A misspells the word “chicken” in their TV commercials?

Little A: Because the cows didn’t go to college…

Me: Do you know what it means when someone says, “Don’t toot your own horn, Billy!”

Little A: Does it have to do with passing gas? If so, it means walk away before you pass gas to be polite to others in your realm.

Me: Do you know WHY the dish ran away with spoon after the cow jumped over the moon?

Little A: They ran away together because they loved each other. Silverware has a tendency to do that, or in this case, I think they do…That’s my take. {shrugs shoulders}

Me: So, I know how much you love Imagine Dragons. If you could have dinner with Dan Reynolds, what would you wear, where would you go to eat, and would you hug him or offer him a handshake? I don’t think he believes in cooties…

Little A: I would wear normal clothes, of course. Like shorts, and stuff. We would go to Chick-Fil-A, and I’d give him a handshake. I’d hug him after dessert. I think the time would be right then.

Me: Who’s your favorite? Mom or Dad? Wait…don’t answer that. Your Dad might read this, and it would make him sad…

MomandLittleA

Me: Tell me, what is the meaning of life?

Little A: Can I ask Siri this question? No? Well then, life is just life. Live it, and live it good because we only get one.

Me: If Hogwarts was real…and I’m not necessarily saying it isn’t, but it might not be, but we like to believe that it is…what house do you think the Sorting Hat would choose for you and why?

Little A: Ravenclaw because it’s EPIC.

Me: How old do you think you’ll be when you get married? What do you think her name will be?

Little A: I’ll be 92 when I get married. Her name will be…{hanging upside down in the chair out of boredom}…

Me: If you could be invisible for one day, what would you do? It has to be legal, by the way.

Little A: It has to be legal?! Darn it…I would go knock on people’s doors and scare them. Maybe give them chocolate…melted chocolate…

Me: Luggage is to vacation, like tools are to…?

Little A: What? Say it again? Work, I guess. Tools are to work, because I don’t know of anyone who uses tools to play with. You shouldn’t play with tools. Especially if they are Dad’s tools…

 

Mom Love Times A Million ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

An Open Letter To The Glitch Mob From a Grateful Mother In Dallas

Life has a way of moving at lightening speed. And as it moves, you move with it, leaving you hungover with irreplaceable memories.

In the past week, I have been incredibly humbled by a number of things, including an inbox full of emails and comments from people around the world in regards to my previous blog post, An Open Letter To The Glitch Mob From a Tired Mother in Dallas. Whoa. 168 hours ago I was sitting in my home office drinking coffee, wiping the sleep from my tired eyes, wondering what to fix for lunch…leftover pot roast or boxed macaroni and cheese…leaning more towards the macaroni option, in case you were wondering…when my world became yours.

I went from fuzzy house shoes at home, to black boots in The Glitch Mob’s dressing room at The House of Blues in Dallas in a matter of hours with my oldest son. Rock on, chili dog. Totally.

My left ear had an annoying “buzzing” sound for three days after the concert. Totally worth it! I must have said, “Huh?” a thousand times last week though. I’m going to continue using this tactic when my middle child asks me what’s for dinner each night…

GlitchMobMoments

The Glitch guys are beyond sweet, totally down to earth, and incredibly generous. I have to admit, I wish more bands were like this today.

Fans frame your future.

These guys get it, and they take it to a higher level than I ever expected. That REALLY says something. I genuinely mean that.

I wanted to share a few comments that were sent to me over the past week that did NOT make the “approved” list from fellow #GlitchMom goers. These are ACTUAL questions/comments I received, yes. They deserve an answer, but in a more filtered environment.

1) I want your phone number. – Send me your phone number first, and then I’ll send you mine. Mine starts with, 555-xxxx. Is yours the same?

2) You’re hot. – My husband agrees with you…

3) Have you ever considered asking The Glitch Mob for a PR job? Ask for Donny if you do. I’ll make sure he knows you’ll be in contact. – No, actually… and who’s Donny? I’m guessing it’s not a “Donny” that any of the band members or their staff knows considering the email address this comment was sent from started with, hustlepictures@…Thank you for playing (air quotes) “Donny”…

4) Will you write my collage literature paper for me please? – Do you mean college literature paper? Or, do you want me to make you a collage of literature on a piece of paper? Get back to me on this and we’ll talk…

5) Would you be willing to tell Josh “hello” for me?! – Sure. Hello Josh! <—- Sent from Stephanie in Idaho

6) You’re lame. Not really. You’re awesome! – Thanks! I mean, not really. I like cats…no, birds…fish!…trees…Christmas presents!!!!

If this wasn’t enough, my youngest son’s 10th birthday is today. He is a child with a very giving heart, and one that insisted adamantly that my husband and I didn’t need to buy him a birthday present this year. There was no way we were going to let the dive into double digits pass by without a present.

So, we took his greatest love, Imagine Dragons, and turned it into something he can hold onto forever. This video is something I will cherish for the rest of my life.

 

My middle child…the quiet one. The one with a creative mind like his mother. I owe him. I hope Linkin Park is available for dinner sometime next month. I bet their number starts with 555-xxxx also….I’ll give’m a ring…

Grateful #GlitchMom ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

An Open Letter To The Glitch Mob From a Tired Mother In Dallas

momswholoveTGM

@editbeats, @ooah, @boreta ~

The above is how I refer to you three sweet guys. I am an Instagram fanatic, so “@” symbol names are as good as royalty titles. Word.

I use “sweet” loosely since I don’t know any of you personally, but when motherhood hits you in the face everyone becomes “sweetie”, “love”, “sweetheart” and “pookey bear”. Seriously. Just go ask your moms…

I am attending your concert tonight in Dallas at The House of Blues. My oldest son is quite enthralled with your music. Never in a million years did I ever think I’d be telling the ladies at book club, “Yes Beverly, I heard the Elton John concert was incredibly amazing!” (Takes a looonnnnggg sip of wine…) “I am really looking forward to seeing this epic concert on March 24th though. I mean, sheesh,  Elton John is the bomb, but The Glitch Mob, girl you don’t know what music IS until you’ve heard these beats!” <—-I’m sure this sentence just aged me 20 years in your eyes.

GlitchMobSetup

I admit, you are on my repeated playlist on my iPhone. Secondly, I even have a Spotify station dedicated to you. You are quite special to this mother who sings “Beauty of the Unhidden Heart” in the car on the way to Target to buy dog biscuits and hydrating shampoo…

This morning, I told myself I was going to sleep in. Your concert starts at 9pm tonight. Who scheduled this? An 18 year old? I go to bed at 9:30 each night to watch one re-run of Modern Family, and one re-run of Friends. This is my schedule, and I don’t like changing it. Tonight I will be forced to miss my old person motherhood schedule to drive 45 minutes to bring my 13 year old son to see his favorite group ever. When you are a parent, you do crazy things; things you used to do as a teenager. Except instead of binge drinking, you stay out late to take your teen to see The Blades. I don’t know what The Blades are, but I’m guessing it doesn’t have anything to do with a Skintimate commercial…Just a hunch.

There is a trip planned to 7-Eleven to buy a Red Bull before tonight’s venture. The only time I drink these carbonated beverages from Hades is when my husband and I go to Vegas each year. Alone. Without kids. To do things without kids. Like, sleep in late and play The Wizard of Oz slot machine. Because everyone knows that Dorothy’s red shoes means the bonus round is commencing and you might win $20 bucks even though you just wasted $60 WAITING for the bonus round…I’m getting off topic…

It is also Monday. I hate Mondays as it is. Although your concert this evening will make my Monday a little brighter, it is going to cause my Tuesday to stink like spoiled chicken. I am convinced tomorrow night my old person motherhood bedtime will be closer to 7:30, thus forcing me to miss my re-runs. I’m not sure how I feel about this yet. Maybe The Blades will convince me otherwise. We’ll see, sweet ones…

My children and I saw Imagine Dragons last month in Dallas. We also had the pleasure of meeting Nico Vega, and spent a bit of time conversing with Aja Volkman. When my oldest son told her how much he loved her vocals on your new album, her sincere nod and, “Nice. Thank you so much! You’ve got great taste in music, my friend…seriously,” has been the topic of MANY conversations at the dinner table ever since. So much so, I want to tape his mouth shut at times. I’m kidding, not really…(clearing throat)

So, I am already aware that I will probably be the oldest person attending your concert this evening. I am okay with that, I suppose. We’ve been listening to you since before the dawn of time, so it’s only right that we come and experience who you are in person. No, we will not wait for you in the back alley standing around like weirdos, wishing to scream, “Oh My Gaw, it’s The Glitch Mob! Like, you guys are totally freakin’ awesome, here, can you please sign my forehead for me?”, but we will come and support your music.

Because you’re kinda cool… Not “kinda”, you’re cooler than a fat kid in a candy store, let’s keep it real. I will be a zombie tomorrow for you with pupils the size of dinner plates because of the amount of coffee I will inhale, literally, to stay awake. But more importantly, I’ll have a kid who got to experience the explosive encounter of hearing The Glitch Mob live. And for me, that’s enough. Because this is what moms do for their kids. At least, I do. Please don’t forget that I’m missing my old person motherhood bedtime for you though. There is true meaning in this. Dedication and respect, right there. This is incredibly important. I expect The Blades to keep me awake…

P.S. I hope you don’t have any future encounters with noisy refrigerators. They are quite annoying, aren’t they?

T.G.M. (otherwise known as, The Good Mother) –

VSK

 

** FOLLOW-UP**

I am so honored, and so immensely blessed to have received so many comments, posts and emails pertaining to this blog post from all of you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am truly humbled, amazed, grateful, and genuinely thankful for The Glitch Mob. I owe them the world, and then some. My son and I were so blessed to get to meet the members of the Mob in person before their set this past Monday night in Dallas. They were incredibly sweet, and truly kind in every way possible. A night my son and I will never forget. Ever.

#GlitchMom for life,

Val

GlitchMobMom

Holiday Songs

Politically Incorrect Christmas Carols – Day 1 – “Baby It’s Cold Outside”

kilt

Today I was listening to Pandora while putting up Christmas decorations with my kids. Yes, it is only November 13th. Yes, perhaps that’s a little crazy, but I decided to roll with it.

I LOVE Christmas music. Let me get that straight upfront before you accuse me of being a holiday hater. As a woman of words who feeds off of books, song lyrics and scripts I started listening. Like, REALLY LISTENING, to the lyrics of some of the holiday songs that we sing like well-trained carolers every year for roughly two months, before tucking them away and turning back to Roar by Katy Perry.

For the next month and a half, I’d like to break down the lines to some of our favorites. Humorously. But I think we owe it to ourselves to know WHAT exactly we are singing about as we stand in a 4 mile long line to check out at Walmart, a cart full of cr@p (you came in for two gift baskets, and you’re leaving with a box of 4800 candy canes, a Santa Claus dressed in a hawaiian shirt, reindeer slippers that jingle when you walk, and an angel dressed in camo holding a rifle), with a credit card in your hand while humming Jingle Bells as the lady in front of you picks her nose, and wipes it on the flannel sleeve of her plaid shirt. Welcome to the holidays. 🙂

Let’s break this down shall we? Up first…

baby-its-cold-outside

I really can’t stay (Baby, it’s cold outside) <—- Where is she in a hurry to? The grocery store, to donate blood, another date? I think we need this information upfront before singing about it.

I’ve got to go ‘way (Baby, it’s cold outside) <—– It’s AWAY, not ‘way. This is not 1995. No way! Way…

The evening has been (I’ve been hopin’ that you’d drop in) <—– Has been….delightful? Magical? Horrible? Weird? Awkward? Why didn’t she call before coming over? I smell a sinful secret here.

So very nice (I’ll hold your hand, they’re just like ice) <—- If your hands are ice cold, I refuse to hold them. Warm them up, then we’ll talk.

My mother will start to worry (Hey beautiful, what’s your hurry) <—-33 and living with your mom. It’s sweet of you to leave without telling her in the first place. Apparently you don’t own a cell phone.

And father will be pacing the floor (Listen to that fireplace roar) <—-My dad would have already called the cops by now. The fireplace doesn’t roar, it crackles. If it roars, apparently you are talking to Sirius Black in Harry Potter.

So really, I’d better scurry (Beautiful, please don’t hurry) <—-Rats scurry. I skip. If you scurry away, apparently you have no sense of direction. 

Well, maybe just a half a drink more (Put some music on while I pour) <—-Let’s keep drinking so I can get behind the wheel. Sounds like a stellar idea. Music? I’ll put some AC/DC on….

The neighbors might think (Baby, it’s bad out there) <—-Alright, you two are definitely cheating. It is bad out there. Especially if his wife comes home early.

Say, what’s in this drink (No cabs to be had out there) <—-Xanex. Enjoy.

I wish I knew how (Your eyes are like starlight now) <—-How to what? Tie your shoes, ride a bike, kill a cockroach, juggle oranges? Your eyes look like starlights because you’ve been drinking for the past hour. Duh.

To break this spell (I’ll take your hat, your hair looks swell) <—-Okay, now I’m beginning to think we are dealing with Mary Poppins. Yes. It’s Mary Poppins and Harry Potter. I KNEW it.

I oughtta say no, no, no sir (You mind if I move in closer) <—-She said no, bro! What up? She didn’t invite you to “move in closer”. She said, no, no, no. That usually means…NO.

At least I’m gonna say that I tried (And what’s the sense in hurting my pride) <—-A slap across the cheek usually works. Or yelling. Or running…running is good.

I really can’t stay (Oh baby, don’t hold out) <—-You’ve been saying that for a while, but you are still here. I bet your mother is hysterical and your dad is fuming by now. Just a guess, sweetie.

Oh, but it’s cold outside <—-Put a coat on. Just a suggestion. Or a Snuggie.

My sister will be suspicious (Your lips look delicious) <—- I knew it! It’s your sister’s husband! Ah-ha! 

My brother will be there at the door (I ain’t worried about you brother) <—- Whoa. What kind of family IS this?!

My maiden aunt’s mind is vicious (That ol’ biddy, she ain’t gonna bother me) <—- Is this an episode of Downton Abbey? Or maybe an episode of Real Housewives of Orange County? I think we’ll go with Jerry Springer on this one.

Well maybe just a cigarette more (You don’t need no cigarette, it’s smokin’ plenty up in here) <—- Smoking, drinking, canoodling, cheating….if this isn’t the perfect picture of a happy holiday family, I don’t know what is…

I’ve got to get home (Baby, you’ll freeze out there) <—- Seriously, put on a coat. Should I spell that for you? Or better yet, have you ever heard of a jacket? Sweater? Housecoat?

Say, lend me a comb (It’s up to your knees out there) <—- You need to brush your hair? What if he has lice? “Say, this has been such a romantic evening I feel like brushing my hair.” Best turn on line EVER. 

You’ve really been grand (I thrill when you touch my hand) <—- You’ve been a jerk and pushed her boundaries. Please don’t call her tomorrow.

Oh, but don’t you see (How can you do this thing to me) <—- See what? Oh wait, yikes…things are getting a little too personal here. Cue the chorus….

There’s bound to be talk tomorrow (Well, think of my lifelong sorrow) <—- Ya think?! You had it coming. Your mom is worried and your dad is pacing. You’re cheating with your sister’s husband, your brother is about to show up, and the neighbors are spying.  I assume it will sound more like yelling than talking though by the time this is over…

At least there will be plenty implied (If you caught pneumonia and died) <—- Happy thoughts. Way to end a song. With death after a fantastic night. Warms my heart like lumpy gravy.

I really can’t stay (Get over that hold out) <—-Get over that hold out? Apparently you need to put the bottle down, sweetheart.

Oh, but baby it’s cold outside <—- {sigh} We’ve discussed this. We. Have. Discussed. This.

Happiness All Around ~

VSK

Random Thoughts From An Avid Author

What Pandora Has Taught Me About Life And Such

No, I’m not talking about THIS Pandora.

I’m talking about THIS Pandora.

I am addicted to to Pandora. Like, utterly and ridiculously addicted to the ever changing stations of pure bliss and discovery. It is indeed like opening Pandora’s Box! I tend to listen to this radical new radio station when I’m working or writing.

I bypass this channel…

For this EPIC channel instead…

While listening to this classical station while writing my latest novel, The Power of Suggestion

This came on…

And I thought, what does Snoop have to do with my boy “Bee”? But, I gave him the benefit of the doubt and thought to myself, “Snoop must love those symphony throw-downs too!” Rock it my friend…or rap it…whatever fits your mood today.

Pandora can be SO random. I think that’s what I love about it. 🙂

P.S. This cute kid resembles JB, don’t you think? Except way cuter! {Clearing throat}…yeah, he’s mine…and I am biased. Amen.

Rock The Box ~

VSK

Uncategorized

The Belongings of an Author

There are so many things that contribute to my writings as an author. And, it’s not just the creative thoughts whirling from my mind ninety miles an hour 24/7.

How many of you can relate to these examples? Whether you are a writer, musician, artist or anything in between…what helps to get your creative juices flowing? Share with me! It’s all about learning from one another.

1) Snacks

I always have to munch on something while writing. Yes, I do choose healthy things too…like carrots, cottage cheese with pears and celery sticks with pimento. I decided not to share a pic of my highly unorganized fridge today though. 🙂

2) Pandora

Pandora…brilliant. The artist I find myself listening to the most is Jason Reeves. He has played many a song for me while writing The Gift of Fate.  His album “The Magnificent Adventures of Heartache – And Other Frightening Tales” is incredible. Deserves a listen! I also love listening to The Beatles and Adele.

3) Books

One must read to write…This is only a very small amount of books that I currently own.

4) Lists

What does it take to be successful at achieving your dreams? All of the above…plus so much more. Never ever take no for an answer. Be you…be great.

~ VSK